UNDERSTANDING OUR LOVED ONE'S EMOTION

                             We’ve all heard the saying, “the only constant is change.”  As we care for aging loved ones, change affects all aspects of their lives and our lives.  Retirement may make the retiree question how they can continue to make meaningful contributions—a question that many times affects self esteem.  Changes in vision, hearing, and other senses occur increasingly, often leading to frustration in the person experiencing the change.  Chronic health issues such as mobility impairment and memory changes can be more than frustrating; they can be downright debilitating.  Downsizing or moving into different surroundings can further test one’s already fragile emotional stability.  Deaths of spouses, family, or friends, and the loss and grief associated with those changes can add up and take a toll emotionally and physically.

Try to Listen and Understand

It is difficult for a caregiver to truly understand what it is like to be the one who is aging and needs care. One of the most important skills you can develop as a caregiver is to listen.  We must try to spend more time listening to our loved ones, rather than telling them what to do.  Let your loved one make the decisions they can.  Sometimes too much help can be no help at all, especially if it frustrates your loved one. They may reject your care and reject the reality of their aging.
Sometimes the best course of action is simply spending time with your loved one, even if the time is very brief. Sharing activities such as going out to eat, shopping, reading, or just being together and providing a sympathetic ear, can help ease the process of aging and the transition to the new parent-child dynamic. Regular contact by phone, email or a simple “thinking of you” card helps combat feelings of isolation.